Dreams: n. 1. A series of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations occurring involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep....4. A wild fancy or hope

About a year ago I was sitting in my dorm room working on something and i kind of drifted into a somewhat trance. It hit me that I really didn't know what my dreams were. Up until that point I knew exactly what I aspired to in my life. I knew what I wanted from my actions. I knew what I wanted to accomplish. But one day I didn't anymore. I didn't know where my life was going. I didn't know what I wanted to be, not just as a professional adult but as a person in general. I didn't know what I wanted to be known for. I had the remnants of what I wanted but those dreams and aspirations didn't really feel right anymore. They were too far gone and I didn't really feel like I could get them back or even wanted to.

I started getting down on myself. I started wondering if I was ever any good at anything. I felt dumb, I felt stupid. I felt as if I had nothing I was supposed to do. I couldn't get out of that feeling. No one could help either. Some tried to show me that I was wrong but I felt they thought they were smarter than me so I didn't really hear them. One day I sat down in my dad's hospital room and talked with my parents about it. They encouraged me a lot and I walked away from there feeling good about life again. I felt that I needed to take a step back and re-evaluate my dreams.

When I did that I found that my dreams had changed. My wants had changed. My goals were elsewhere. My passion for photography had grown, my desire to help others was a lot bigger, my heart was headed somewhere I wasn't expecting. After April, things changed even more. My heart began to grow for a ministry with teenage girls so that they might see themselves as Christ does. I want to be an encourager of people, a true friend, a daughter of Christ, and a woman who know who she is and isn't afraid to be herself with people.

Those dreams are a lot different than the ones before. They're more permanent, more centered, more substantial. See these goals are lifetime goals and lifetime commitments. Of course I still have the dream of a gorgeous wedding and loving husband and family, but I feel that all that will come as long as I center myself on my goals in Christ. They're the most important. They're the ones that are the most vital to my existence.

Ahh dreams.